So what have I’ve been up to lately? Well getting my life in order I guess. The reason why I haven’t been posting much lately was because my whole group was retrenched, right after Super GT (At least I managed to use the company’s T1 line to upload all my photos before they made the group redundant).
Hence my lack of posts, though that’s not to say I was inactive. I did go to Bon Odori 2010 just to relax and forget my worries for a while.
It’s funny, 2 years in this company and I get retrenched again. Damn just my luck. At least they gave quite a nice severance package (a few months even though I only worked for 2 years) as compared to my last employer who basically didn’t give shit but what do you expect from an MNC operating in a free-trade zone?
So I decided to take this as an opportunity to bum out for a month before deciding on what to do next. Though I spent most of it catching up on many things,
- Moving out of my place since the landlord was selling the place. Moved in with my Brother and his wife.
- Clean out a lot of junks I didn’t need anymore since I moved down to KL
- Worked on improving my photography skills.
- Deciding to brush up on my Linux programming skills, its been more than 4 years since I work in Linux at Intel.
Though truth be told, I was just stalling for time on what to do next. Sooner or later I would need to face the odious of deciding my future. There was a lot of self-reflection and soul-searching but it had to be done. So when I finally did everything to delay this inevitable tasks, I spent another few more weeks thinking on what to do next…….
I had never thought on what to do next…..
Usually I just play the cards I’m dealt with, never waiting for anything better. I make choices and I carry them out, whether they were right or wrong for me. I never had a set goal or target. I just simply went along with life, not kicking and screaming away at it when I should have been to get what I wanted. Because I always thought you could never win at life.
I thought long and hard, grown fed-up with being a software developer and initially I thought of actually moving back to my hometown and work for my father in his civil engineering firm.
Heck, I even began to make plans and preparation to go back when for the first time in my life.
I felt I didn’t want to go back
There would be nothing for me there. But then what was here for me in KL?
What was I working toward?
And sure enough, I realized I never had any, I put it off thinking about it and spent most of my time re-learning programming in Linux (I had been doing windows programming for 4 years and I realized what a lame programmer I had become using Windows). I used to love this shit! What happened?
After a while, I remember the reason why I love programming and I wanted to do this for a living (although I still love photography as well but then I don’t want it to be a job). It was the thrill of developing software, testing debugging and solving a major problem with computers. The more I got back into Linux programming the more I realized I had forgotten. Damn, it was such a thrill! It was like tasting your long lost favorite favor of ice-cream! Sweet and just the way you remembered it! I remembered why I got into this business!
I then got off my laurel and went looking for a job developing in Linux and found it! I realized the only time I enjoyed working was when I was at Intel developing software in Linux. I always found Windows programming to be so boring! Sure Microsoft has made some fantastic tools to development but I didn’t understand anything behind their framework. It had alway been a blackbox to most people. But with Linux/Unix/Solari, I could just ripped it open and understand it.
So here I am again, this time I feel so much better now. In some ways, the retrenchment was a good thing, I got paid a lot of moola, remembered why I love programming and got an even better job!