Recently I’ve been having many problems on what I should be doing for the rest of my life,
- Continue my journey for my enrichment of knowledge?
- Once again try and find that elusive perfect job?
- Or settle down
Choice 3 is out of the question, I simply have no wish to find “someone” and have kids just because my parents desperately want grand children. My family already has a guaranteed successful heir to their name and yet they still want me to settle down now.
If I was to settle down, I would forever hate myself as I did not get to find myself in this cruel world call life. I would be relegated to nothing more then just another “person” even to myself.
Thus in the next month or so I will be doing some serious thinking on what I should do for next year. Why the sudden decision to change? Well it actually being building up for a while now but yesterday I received the final catalyst (bad news) for what has now began my search of my own answer. I simply cannot go on in life at least until I find my answer.
Where ever it may take me, most likely I will travel again out of this country. I only felt alive when I was in Australia and now believe my answer is still out there. Not here in Malaysia, where life is very putrid and rancid at the same time terribly depressing and oppressed. For the next month or so I will begin to craft a plan, I only hope now that fate will smile on me and help me with some of the details and problems I will face indefinitely when I finally decide to put my plan into action some January 2008.
So pleasant dreams……..